does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
