You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
