I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
