Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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