so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
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