from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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