Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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