If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
i out mim tonsoeep
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
