one two three fourrrrnication!
you have to choose: penises or morals?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
