I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
