Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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