No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
