She said her name was "party"
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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