so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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