i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
