Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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