is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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