love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
