left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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