Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
We just shotgunned beers for America
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
