You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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