we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
