Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize