I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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