He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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