Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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