awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
