And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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