suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
