you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize