White coat. Heels.
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize