there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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