WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
