Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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