erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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