You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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