that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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