that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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