i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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