im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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