Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Randomize
