sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
