why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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