So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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