Buhtt sex?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
