I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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