Heybabeimwearingurpanties
from now on my penis is your penis
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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