Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
