I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
