hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
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