Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize