Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
