He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
