if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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